Waiting is Hard to Do

L started 6th grade and F started Pre-School.  Where has the time gone?  We started the day with new clothes, new backpacks, breakfast and pictures on the front porch.  It was the first time in our daughters' lifetime that daddy was not there.  He had his own classroom to get ready.  At the end of the day, both girls were excited and ready to share all of their stories.  F's highlight was playing on the playground and snack.  L's highlight was getting a locker and switching classes.

J had his first day of school jitters.  As a child I never stopped to think about my teachers having feelings, let alone nerves.  But, now I am married to a teacher and ..... they have feelings and nerves!  We even took a big boy picture of him, in his new outfit, standing on the front porch on his first day too.

But I stop to think about my daughter's first day of school that I am going to miss.  See, K's orphanage has shut down.  On September 1st, she will leave the orphanage building where she has been staying, move into an "apartment" and start trade school.  This is something we were praying she would NOT have to do.  We were praying we would be there before September 1st so she would NOT have to go to trade school.  But now she is, and we won't be there.  There won't be anyone there to take her picture, she won't have a new outfit to wear, she never went shopping for new school clothes, she won't have a picture of her standing on the front porch, holding the homemade sign saying "First Day of Trade School."  She will simply enter school under her orphan number.

We have not heard any news on the adoption front.  We may not hear anything for another three weeks.  We just wait..... and wait.  We have sent K three packages.  Usually just candy, cheap fashion jewelry, notebook, etc.  Nothing too major but worth a million dollars to her.  Well we sent a 4th package on August 4th. This time, we included a New Testament written in Ukrainian, along with candy, pens and headbands.  But this one never made it.  We are so heartbroken over it.  THIS was the package we REALLY wanted her to get.

I have learned through this adoption process that it is possible to be happy, sad, excited and disappointed all at the same time and usually within ten seconds of each other.  I am excited for our friends that leave on Saturday to Ukraine to adopt their daughter, I am disappointed that we haven't heard if we have been approved by SDA, I am happy that my girls here love school and look forward to going, I am sad that my oldest daughter will start her first day of school at a place she does not want to be and no one is there to kiss her on her forehead when she lays down at night.

So in true pitty party fashion......I am off to watch The Notebook!!